these thoughts...

these thoughts...

... they are spinning around in my head

... they keep haunting me

... i shouldn't have them

... they're wrong

-------------------------------

yesterday i saw the cover of a movie.
this one person in it reminded me of someone.
in the evening i thought i had already forgotten about him.
but in the night i dreamt of him.
dreamt we were close to each other (not physically).
we both enjoyed our time together.
ever since one day, i saw him in a different light.
thought he had changed.
wondered if he had the same thoughts,
cherishing and despising them the same way, just like me.
but when we last met, i felt he was different.
i wonder what i'll feel the next time we'll see each other.
i want to forget these thoughts,
but i'm afraid of forgetting them as well...

what exactly is it, that i feel?